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Paul the Apostle (Patrick)

from Siamese by TIOUOL

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lyrics

Tell me how you manage yourself, how you polish every surface of your mental health. Because sometimes I just try to conceive how you keep your countless secrets in each time you breathe. I used to write to calm myself down, but these days, that's not helping after what I've found.

That now my love is a business plan, with charts and graphs determining where fate will use his hurting hands to place me. Do you get me? And now, I am overdrawn, and I can't recreate what's gone. It's all too much to focus on.

So I guess in these few months 'til you leave, you'll burn each bridge you've built from love and common grief. And your timing couldn't have been made worse; you could've taken time to make this blow seem less rehearsed. The thinning circle of my close friends is not even worth counting when you're absent.

And your vacant space is all I see when I'm supposed to count my blessings, and each song is stunted halfway through, with no backbone, so guilt-prone and overblown. Let me be the act of God that sets the lightning off and knocks you from your horse and off the ground. You'll lay thinking, always thinking, about all your life's subordinate pawns (a group in which I now belong). It's all too much to focus on.

So I may be going overboard, but I get the feeling that we won't be talking anymore. So I'll get used to the silence, while this rhythm issue will become a meter I'll protect.

And it goes like: "Stress, unstress."

credits

from Siamese, released July 29, 2013

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Anthony Jay Sanders Chicago, Illinois

I sing for The Island of Misfit Toys, I sing for myself, and I definitely sing for you. This is a place to gradually release everything that isn't TIOMT.
For TIOMT music:
tiomt.bandcamp.com

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